40 Years Ago, Risky Business Legitimized Teen Comedy

With due respect to the John Hughes' classic The Breakfast Club, the most important teen movie of the 1980's may very well be Risky Business. Released 40 years ago, Paul Brickman's Risky Business legitimized teen comedy like no film before it and set the stage for the “High Renaissance” of that subgenre that took place in the middle of the decade.

The early 1980's was an era filled with “high school boys looking to get laid” comedies (e.g., Porky's, Losin' it, My Tutor) that were thin on story and heavy on goofy, sometimes inane, humor. But then Risky Business comes along, featuring that same teenage boy out for sex... except now we get to see WHY he's experiencing that sexual frustration (as well as a ton of other anxiety.) We witness the pressure he feels (some applied by his parents, some self-imposed) to raise his SAT score, join school clubs he has little interest in, and get accepted into the college not he, but his parents want. Tom Cruise's Joel Goodson was the first Gen X hero – bored, disillusioned, forced down paths he's not sure he wants to tread and enduring a suburban hell complete with a pristine home/prison, successful parents he can never please or measure up to, and a voice in his head warning he'll “never have a future.” As Joel courageously tries to live up to his surname, his attempts to relieve his growing angst by defiantly maxing the volume on the family stereo and joyriding in his dad's Porsche prove insufficient. Though the apprehension he feels about where he's headed in life is apparent, relief seems unattainable. That is until he's pointed to call girl named Lana with the promise, “It's what you want... it's what every white boy off the lake wants.” It's this exploration of the unknown – the dark, not so pristine world of sex, prostitutes, and life or death run-ins with “killer pimps” – that drives the story of this restless, uneasy Gen-X teenager.

It wouldn't be until the middle of the decade – with Hughes' Breakfast Club, Pretty in Pink, Some Kind of Wonderful trilogy – that teen comedies would so earnestly acknowledge and portray the contemporary fears and anxieties of those of us who came of age in the 80's. Joel's experience in Risky Business underscored a generation's gnawing need to subvert societal conventions and oblivious parents who failed to recognize how much emotional turmoil we were in as we struggled to figure out who we were and what should come next. In the process, we also had to navigate our way through expectations of continuing the American familial tradition that existed since the Great Depression, whereby each succeeding generation acquired more wealth and success than their parents. In these ways, Risky Business actually defined Gen X, crystallized its world view and authored its motto with the ironic and oft quoted line, “Sometimes you gotta say, 'what the fuck.'”

Risky Business would proceed to enter the zeitgeist in several ways. The scene where Joel slides across the hardwood floor in his socks became instantly iconic and has been parodied in everything from The Simpsons to video game commercials. Cruise's wardrobe in the film -- Docksiders, button down dress shirts, Izod polos – became the standard for preppies everywhere and after he sported 60's style Ray Bans in multiple scenes, the brand saw a resurgence that continues to this day. Risky Business proved particularly popular among college students, so much so that within six months, it was screening on university campuses and the film's one-sheet was pretty much the coolest thing you could have hanging in your dorm room. By the following fall, the film was a mainstay on HBO and its many memorable lines -- including “Get off the babysitter!”, “Porsche, there is no substitute.” and “Looks like University of Illinois!” -- were being quoted ad nauseum.

Risky Business further set itself apart with its artful cinematography (Lana’s first appearance; the train sequence) and an ethereal original score by Tangerine Dream that proved a huge departure from the typical teen movie soundtrack full of contemporary pop and new wave hits.

The end result saw audiences immediately embracing the film and its stars. Risky Business grossed $63 million on a $6 million budget and, boosted by positive word of mouth and a strong second run, would finish as the eighth highest grossing film of the year and the #2 comedy behind only Trading Places. An unknown Rebecca De Mornay (who won the role of Lana after Michelle Pfeiffer passed) was catapulted to Hollywood's A-list and, though she worked sparingly, graduated to starring roles in The Trip to Bountiful, The Slugger's Wife, and the And God Created Woman remake. Over her career, she's delivered a string of stellar but overlooked performances in films like Runaway Train, The Three Musketeers and The Hand That Rocks the Cradle. Oh, and that Cruise guy did okay too – starring in films that grossed a combined $10 billion at the box office, earning multiple Oscar nominations and becoming what many consider to be “the last Hollywood movie star.”

Now, forty years later we can look back at Risky Business and it's cleverly written script as the teen comedy that broke the mold and forged an alternative paradigm for the sub-genre. With its more serious take on the teen experience – in this case, through its The Graduate-like themes of eschewing the supposed American dream of an Ivy League education, landing a high paying job, and moving to the suburbs – Risky Business paved the way for John Hughes' films, Say Anything, Adventureland, and virtually every other smart, thoughtful teen comedy that followed.

Related Posts:
The Evolution of the 80s Teen Movie - How Bob Clark, Gen X, and Home Video Changed the Landscape of American Cinema
The Evolution of the 80s Teen Movie - How Bob Clark, Gen X, and Home Video Changed the Landscape of American Cinema - Part II
Welcome to Pop Culture Fiend

Explaining to an Alien How Humans Brush Their Teeth

… So long story short, a prospective employer asked me to take a writing assessment. 

It's for a gig as a freelance marketing writer for an “undisclosed” company. Now this assessment was pretty involved and required me to complete several exercises with both short and long form responses. It was also clear that I would have to conduct research and do some serious strategizing before formulating my answers. Here's an example of what I'm talking about:

A local hair salon wants to run Facebook ads for the Christmas holiday season. They're offering 10% off gift cards that can be used at the salon. Their goal is to retarget potential customers who have visited their website. Their target audience is women ages 18-65 years old. What is your recommended ad copy for their remarketing campaign?

See what I mean?... Serious stuff.

So I get all the way through the assessment to the final exercise and I get this weird curve ball thrown at me that I'm not even sure is for real – maybe it's just a joke or maybe they're trying to see how I would handle an assignment for something way out-of-the-box?... Anyway, this was it:

We're aliens from another planet who have just landed on earth. We understand the English language, but many human activities and normal routines are foreign to us. We also consume food the way butterflies do, so we don't have teeth. To the best of your ability, please help us understand the average human's routine for brushing one's teeth.

I was both annoyed and amused that they asked for this – so much so that I absolutely could not resist having some fun and giving it back to this company in spades. So check it out below -- my response to how I would explain to an alien how humans brush their teeth:

Greetings aliens. How ya doing? Thanks for coming all the way across the galaxy for this. 

Today I'm going to explain to you how to brush your teeth. Teeth, by the way, are these things we humans have in our mouths that cut, mash and pulverize the food we consume before we ingest it. It's important to remember that if we don't brush our teeth, they will decay, rot and fall out -- and then we'd have no way to eat corn on the cob, Tootsie Rolls or Wendy's Baconators -- so you can see why this is so critical. Okay, here we go!

First, we move to an area of the home we call the "bathroom sink." We then turn a handle to start a flow of running water. Hey, did I mention that before we enter the bathroom we should really knock first because someone else could be in there giving themselves a bikini wax or a coffee enema or God knows what.

So to brush our teeth, we begin by squirting this gel-like substance (called "toothpaste") out of this tube onto this short stick with bristles on the end that we call a "toothbrush." We apply enough gel to cover the bristles and then rub the brush back and forth, and up and down on our teeth. (We're told by our experts here on earth to use a circular motion when we do this but trust me, it makes absolutely no difference whatsoever.)

Now periodically, as we are brushing, liquid will build up in our mouths until it's full. When that happens we go ahead and spit out the liquid/toothpaste build up. We try to make sure that it goes in the sink and down the drain because if it doesn't and the mess just lies there, our wives will yell at us.

Next, we add more toothpaste and repeat the brushing process. The experts here on earth (a sadistic group of men and women we call "dentists") say you should brush for about two minutes. That's really just kind of a loose rule though because sometimes you're running late for work or you just want to brush really quickly because you had Italian for dinner and you want to get that garlic taste out of your mouth so you make out with your girlfriend.

Okay, almost done. After we've completed the brushing (and spitting) it's time to "rinse." So what we do is we take our hand and we cup it so we can catch some of the running water in it. By the way, I forgot to mention that the water should ALWAYS be running. Sure, we could turn the faucet handle and only run the water when we need to -- but we're just stupid, lazy humans and destroying our planet by wasting all that water is a lot easier.

We then slurp the cupped handful of water into our mouths and swish it around for a few seconds. Now we spit the liquid out. (Yes, more spitting. Aren't we humans disgusting?) Then we look in the mirror and admire the great job we did by smiling at ourselves. (Maybe even give ourselves a sexy wink because dammit, we deserve it!)  

Lastly, we always leave the toothbrush on the sink and NOT in the toothbrush holder because moving it that extra 12 inches is just way too much work. 

And that's how humans brush their teeth! Tomorrow will be your next lesson... "How to take a dump."

No bullshit, this is what I replied with and sent back.

As I read it back now, it reminds me of this scene in Sleeper, where Miles Monroe (Woody Allen) comes out of a cryogenic freeze in the year 2173 and is asked by scientists to identify the people in a series of photographs from the 20th century. Miles' deadpan explanations are hilarious as he gives his take on everyone from Joseph Stalin to Bela Lugosi. 

A Deep Dive into Barry Allen's Speed: Exactly How Fast is The Flash?

With the recent release of the new movie The Flash, I've found myself pondering the iconic character, his bio, as well as his powers and abilities -- in particular, how fast he's portrayed to be. When it comes to comic book heroes and their superpowers, this sort of speculation is common and makes for great geek debate. But it's worth noting that the Flash character has undergone a good deal of retconning over the years. In addition, the recently concluded WB “Arrowverse” TV series The Flash has greatly added to and confused Flash's mythology, sometimes even venturing into storytelling that deviates from canon. So for this article, I chose to go back and look at the DC Comics Flash and bring to light references to the speed of this earlier version of the character. To help with this I dug into the Pop Culture Fiend Archives and my stash of DC comics from my youth. 

To begin, it's important to remember that 1956-1970 was the "Silver Age of Comics" and 1970-1985 (a timeframe that encompasses my aforementioned collection) the so-called “Bronze Age". The Flash from these two eras is none other than Barry Allen, a Central City police scientist who gained his super speed via an accident in which he's accidentally doused with a mix of chemicals after a lightning strike in his lab (more on this later.) This iteration of the Flash is widely considered to be the definitive version of the character – moreso than Jay Garrick, the original Flash created by Gardner Fox in the 1940's, and also more than Wally West, who began as Kid Flash before later succeeding Barry. The Barry Allen version is also the Flash appearing and/or referenced in the new Flash movie, the aforementioned Arrowverse series, 2017's Justice League and other “Snyderverse” DC pics, as well as several recent video games based on the DC Universe like Justice League Heroes and the Injustice series. So there's no question that when looking to determine how fast "The Flash" is, it's best to begin with Barry Allen, as this is the version who appears the most across all of pop culture.

So with Barry as the focus, when you examine his history and look for references in the comics about his speed, you discover a lot of inconsistency. Early Silver Age issues make a big deal about Barry running on water (something by the way, that would be scientifically possible for a human running even as "slow" as 50 mph) as well as overcoming gravity by running up the sides of  buildings. On the higher end of the scale, we see Silver Age Flash breaking the sound barrier. Comic book writers magnifying each of these specific exploits made a lot of sense at the time. In the 50's and 60's, rocket technology, jet engines, Chuck Yeager going Mach 1, etc., represented the outer reaches of what humans could achieve -- so an “ordinary man" gaining powers to match these types of things was superhuman enough for the comics. (It's very similar to the way Superman, around the same time, was heralded for being "more powerful than a locomotive.") But as we moved into the 1970's and travel faster than sound became so routine that even commercial airlines offered it, the limits of Flash's speed predictably creeped up and his exploits (as we'll see) became more fantastical. 

As Barry carried on through the Silver and Bronze Ages, his extraordinary speed resulted in cool new powers, like the ability to generate mini tornadoes and even time travel. (In the comics, this sometimes -- but not always -- occurs through a combination of Flash's otherworldly speed and a device known as the "cosmic treadmill", which was first introduced in 1961's The Flash #125.) Now follow me here: the speed of light has been calculated since at least the 17th century and in 1905 Albert Einstein theorized time dilation -- the idea that time passes more slowly for objects moving at high speeds and that this effect becomes more pronounced as the object approaches the speed of light. Further theorizing maintains that if a person could actually reach the speed of light, time would in fact stop relative to that individual. So if Silver Age Flash writers like Fox and John Broome knew all this, than by having Barry run so fast that he travels back in time, were they implying that Barry could move faster than the speed of light?...  It's entirely feasible, likely even, that the creative talents at DC were keenly aware of Einstein and his theories. He was, in fact, quite well known and heralded at the time of his death, which was only a year before the Barry Allen character was created. Is it crazy to think that the creators of a fictional character possessing super speed would use Einstein's thoughts on light speed as background and inspirational material for stories about the "fastest man alive?" It's worth noting that the concept of time dilation (i.e., time slowing down and potentially stopping as you approach the speed of light) has been incorporated into Flash comics and TV portrayals over the years, so it seems that at least some Flash writers familiarized themselves with the scientific implications of superspeed and used them to make the Flash and his flirtations with light speed more credible and "realistic." Silver Age Flash comics were also the first to recount incidents of Barry vibrating his molecules so quickly he's able to pass through walls and solid objects. Mastery of his body down to this molecular level is what enables what is arguably Barry’s most notable superpower --- traveling to other universes. This occurs in numerous Flash tales beginning with #123 Flash of Two Worlds. 

Flash's speed has even been defined via comparisons to Superman and in the pages of various DC titles the two have actually raced several times. Many of these head-to-heads were interrupted by emergencies of some sort but the record shows that Barry has bested Kal-El in the vast majority of their matchups. I bring this up because as I painstakingly poured through the history of Barry Allen’s Flash for references to precisely how fast he can run, I happened across a discussion of Superman vs. Flash that actually quantified the latter’s speed quite conclusively. Specifically, within my Justice League of America issues, I recalled an item in the "JLA Mailbag" (a monthly Q&A with DC's editorial staff that appeared at the back of many issues during the late 70's) where a reader asks how fast the Flash can run around the earth. The rather definitive answer given is that while fellow JLA member Superman can fly around the entire earth in about one second, the Flash can run around the earth in 1/10 (.10) of a second. With the circumference of the earth being approximately 25,000 miles, this means the Flash can travel 250,000 miles per second – about 33% FASTER than the speed of light. Extrapolating further, we get a measurement of Flash's speed of 15,000,000 miles per minute and a whopping 90,000,000 miles per hour! This 90,000,000 mph figure represents the highest quantification of Barry's speed during the Silver or Bronze Ages. It is not, however, faster than Modern Age Barry Allen. I'll explain...

For DC, the Bronze Age ended with 1985's Crisis on Infinite Earths in which DC's "multiverse" was eliminated in favor of a single Earth and the entire DC universe was neatly consolidated. The fallout from this was particularly impactful for the Flash because in Crisis on Infinite Earths #8 Barry Allen dies as a result of running so fast and with such intensity that he literally disintegrates. At the same time, to maintain consistency, The Flash comic was canceled. When it was brought back shorty after, Wally West became the new Flash until Barry's return in 2009's Flash: Rebirth. When Barry returns, he is notably faster than he was during his original run through DC's Silver and Bronze Age comics. This is significant because the explanation provided in Rebirth for Barry's absence for more than 20 years is that he wasn't actually dead but rather that he became one with (and/or was trapped in) the Speed Force. 

So now we have to take another step back...

The Speed Force is an energized plane of existence from which DC's "speedsters" draw power. Modern issues of The Flash, the WB series, the new movie, and every other modern take on the Flash include the Speed Force as part of the character's lore. It was introduced, in part, to address and/or resolve questions regarding the anatomical damage a human body would most certainly suffer by running at such incomprehensible speeds. The Speed Force puts a powerful aura around whoever is tapping into it, thereby protecting them from speed-related friction, G-forces, etc. In other words, the Speed Force explains why Flash's costume (and skin) don't tear off... how he's able to see and hear while he runs... and why he doesn't constantly cause sonic booms. 

But the Speed Force is much more than just a protective barrier. It’s also a cosmic realm speedsters can use to travel anywhere in space and time. Those deft or experienced with the Speed Force can enter it and exit anywhere they like. Those not so skilled can get trapped and lost in the Speed Force indefinitely.

But here's the thing... The Speed Force was never a part of the Flash's original lore... Not even close. The first reference to it occurs in 1994 in The Flash #91 written by Mark Waid. He and other Flash writers, including Grant Morrison and Geoff Johns, through their stories, established the Speed Force as an integral part of the Flash's mythology moving forward and also retroactively applied it to Barry Allen's history, along with Jay Garrick's, and well, all other speedsters (good and evil) who ever existed in the DC universe. 

This means that Barry's speed and all of his speed-related past deeds, including time travel, are now explained as being made possible by the existence of the Speed Force. Johns, in Flash: Rebirth even took things a step further by explaining that Barry actually created the Speed Force himself when the lightning bolt struck him in his lab. Once that happened, the Speed Force began expanding in time and space to empower all speedsters before and after Barry. (This origin, however, has been contradicted multiple times and it's now generally accepted that the Speed Force has always existed.) Still, as confusing as its origin may be, the main thing to know about the Speed Force is that it essentially removed all limits to how fast the Flash can travel, up to and including light speed and even beyond.

Modern Age DC comics back this up.  JLA Vol 1. #89 begins with Wally West outrunning a nuclear explosion to save a city of 532,000 people by carrying each inhabitant (1-2 at a time the comic tells us) 35 miles away to safety until every single person is evacuated. Wally does this in .00001 microseconds. I was told there'd be no math but I'm told this equates to a speed of roughly 13 trillion times the speed of light. (But again, that was Wally West and this article is about how fast the definitive Flash, Barry Allen, is.)

Upon Barry's "rebirth" he too demonstrates enhanced speed and performs feats infinitely more impressive than he ever had previously, including running in the sky. It seems the "new" Barry is more dialed into and able to draw more power from the Speed Force than most other speedsters apart from Wally West. This results in a vast increase in Barry's top speed during the Modern Age. And it's precisely because the existence of the Speed Force has been retconned into Barry's history, there are presumably no limits to how fast he potentially could have been during the Silver and Bronze Ages either. Looking at it this way neatly reconciles and gives more credibility to the 90,000,000 mph attestation by the DC editorial staff I identified earlier.

In the end, we know this is the world of comics, which is rife with inconsistencies, contradictions and countermanding in matters relating to both character bios and storylines. Arguably, it's Wally who has proved most adept at marshalling the Speed Force and usurping its power to reach new limits but Barry too has used the Speed Force to reach incomprehensible speeds. Depending on how much he's able to tap into it, he has unlimited speed -- faster than light, faster than thought, faster than death, faster than time... He's even fast enough to live an all-encompassing, entirely instantaneous existence... 

So yeah, he's pretty freaking fast.

Dick, Jason, Tim or Damian... Which Robin is Batman's Best Partner?

Throughout his close to ninety year run in the comics, Batman has managed to best nearly every adversary he's ever faced. When he has suffered defeat (at the hands of Bane, Lady Shiva and a handful of others) it's often because he went it alone without the help of his faithful companion Robin. With Robin by his side, Batman is a far more formidable and exponentially greater crime fighting force -- but this begs the question, which Robin is the best partner for the Dark Knight? Some might choose the ingenious Tim Drake; others might say Damian Wayne with his superior fighting prowess, or even the ruthless, whatever-it-takes-to-win Jason Todd. Arguments can be made for all but the most well-rounded and suitable sidekick for Batman has proven to be the one and only Boy Wonder, Dick Grayson.

Dick is the epitome of everything Robin is supposed to be and from the very beginning, Bruce Wayne connects with Dick in ways he never did with any other Robin. This began with Bruce taking Dick in and making him his ward after his parents were murdered. Bruce's parents were similarly killed by criminals, resulting in a tragic but unique bond the two share over the course of their lives. More significantly, as Dick's guardian and mentor, what is it that Bruce wants most for his young charge?... The same thing any father (or in this case, surrogate father) would want – for him to grow, thrive, succeed, and eventually stand on his own two feet. Through his long term evolution as Robin, his leadership role in the Teen Titans and his subsequent new identity as Nightwing. Dick accomplishes this quite profoundly, all the while mirroring Batman's greatest virtues – shrewd crime solving, unquestioned bravery, mastery of martial arts, and an unrelenting need to bring criminals to justice. In contrast, during his run as Robin, the rebellious Jason is the proverbial “problem child” who demonstrates Bruce's worst qualities – violence, anger, and a sometimes disturbing brutality when dealing with his foes. Eventually, Jason becomes Red Hood, an antihero who acts with a type of callousness and vigilantism that Bruce struggles his whole career to keep suppressed.

Damian Wayne's Robin has similar character flaws. Cocky, spoiled, entitled, and (like Jason) violent to the point of murder, he was genetically engineered, grown in an artificial womb and trained to be a killing machine by the League of Assassins. Bruce had no influence on him during his crucial formative years and in fact, doesn't even learn of Damian's existence (his birth was kept hidden by his mother) until he's ten years old. By then it's too late, as Damian's self-importance, hostility, and borderline sociopathy preclude him from bonding with Bruce in ways similar to Dick.

Dick is also the one who keeps Bruce connected to his humanity. Apart from Alfred, Dick represents the closest thing to family that Bruce has. Yes, technically Damian is Bruce's biological son, but he was bio-engineered and raised and trained by others. Tim Drake also came to Bruce nearly fully-formed, having rigorously trained himself in physical combat, detective work, scholastics, etc. Dick, on the other hand, came to Bruce as a piece of clay – ready and willing to be molded into the ideal protege and crime-fighting partner. Along the way, he becomes a stabilizing force in Bruce's life, drawing him back from the brooding, darkest sides of himself and preventing him from becoming a heartless, criminal-bashing brute.

Finally, it's worth noting that Tim Drake himself, in Batman: A Lonely Place of Dying, astutely and succinctly declares, “Batman needs a Robin.” What makes this even more profound is that Tim says this to none other than Dick Grayson, as he's beseeching him to rejoin a Bruce who is wrestling with demons after Jason Todd's death. This shows that even Tim himself understands that Dick is fundamentally the truest Robin... and the best partner Batman ever had.